Chaos-George Santayana

Chaos is a name for any order that produces confusion in our minds. - George Santayana

Youth Is...

Youth is like spring, an over praised season more remarkable for biting winds than genial breezes. Autumn is the mellower season, and what we lose in flowers we more than gain in fruits. - Samuel Butler

What's Worse?

It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. - Theodore Roosevelt

Rejoice In Another's Prosperity!

To rejoice in another's prosperity, is to give content to your own lot: to mitigate another's grief, is to alleviate or dispel your own. - Thomas Edwards

Plenty of Opportunities Around-Just Focus

"No great man ever complains of want of opportunities" - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Success - A Champion Succeeds Through Power Communicating

Success - A Champion Succeeds Through Power Communicating
By Mark Bowser

It has been said that public speaking is a fear worse than death for many people. Well, the truth is that we will not be as successful as we could be unless we improve our communication skills. In this article, we are going to explore some insights and action steps, which lead to more effective communication. The only way to really conquer a fear is to confront it and jump right in. With that in mind, let's get started.

1. Realize that communication may be the most important skill we can learn. We all need to be able to express our thoughts effectively. We are creatures of relationships. Relationships are very important to us. In order to make our relationships better we must make our communication better.

2. Guard our tongues. Sometimes the most important message is the one we never give. Have you ever said something and then wish we could take it back? I think all of us have. Controlling our tongues is one of the most important and most difficult communication challenges. In another chapter in this manual we go into more detail on how to accomplish this task.


3. Decide that communication is a priority. If something is a priority then what do we usually give it? ANSWER: Time and Commitment.

4. Talk with people not at them. Have you ever been talked DOWN to? How did it make you feel? How did you feel at that moment about the person talking to you? Not too good right? We need to talk WITH people. We need to make our communication conversational and user friendly. We need to ask ourselves, "How can I uplift this person as I express my thoughts and opinions?" This will help us communicate our messages in a more compassionate way. Even if we have to communicate some ugly message, compassion will see us through.

5. Have an open door policy. We must make time for people. If we lived in President Lincoln's day and wanted to speak with the president all we would have to do is walk in the White House and sit outside his door. When he came out, we would be able to speak with him. We need to do the same thing. If it worked for the president, it will work for us. If at that moment it is not appropriate, then make an appointment with them.

6. Understand what Dale Carnegie & Associates, Inc. believe when they say, "Communication is built on trusting relationships." If people don't trust us, then why would they listen to us?

7. Prepare, prepare, prepare. Speakers USA, Inc. was a national speakers association, which helped train me. They used to tell us that if we want a talk/presentation to look impromptu then make sure it is not. In other words do your homework and practice, practice, prepare, prepare, prepare.

8. Don't give a public presentation/talk unless you are passionate and knowledgeable about the topic. If we are not passionate about the topic then it will come across flat and boring. If we are not knowledgeable about the topic then our credibility will drop.

9. Make sure your body language, tone of voice, and message are congruent.

Suppose I came up to you and said in a very gruff tone, "Sure, I would love to have the boss over for dinner!" Do you think I really want the boss to come over for dinner? You don't think so? Why? ANSWER: Because I wouldn't be congruent. When we aren't congruent in every way, then we give mixed messages to our listeners.

10. Have patience. Communication, particularly public communication, is not easy. Be patient with yourself. You won't become an expert overnight. Keep practicing and keep improving.

11. Look for the benefit of our differences. We need to constantly remind ourselves that different doesn't necessarily mean wrong.

12. If agreement cannot be made then agree to disagree. A great way to keep the peace.

13. Keep your cool when someone improperly states something. They may not be trying to insult you. Have you ever thought you were being insulted but were not sure? Instead of reactively attacking back, just wait. They may have just said something in an awkward fashion. Don't jump to conclusions. Believe me, if they were actually trying to insult you and they thought you didn't get it, they will insult you again. And if they were insulting you then just simply tell them that you don't appreciate it and that you forgive them.

14. Always try to part on a positive upbeat ending. Nobody likes to leave with a sour attitude in his/her stomach. Always try to make peace before you end a conversation.

15. Loyalty many times comes from private conversations. Build trust by keeping confidences.

16. Use stories to illustrate your points. Jesus Christ always used stories when He taught the crowds. Abraham Lincoln believed in stories too. Lincoln said, "They say I tell a great many stories. I reckon I do; but I have learned from long experience that plain people, take them as they run, are more easily influenced through the medium of a broad and humorous illustration than in any other way...." REMEMBER: ALWAYS HAVE A POINT TO YOUR STORY.

17. Learn to speak off the cuff (extemporaneously). Lincoln said, "Extemporaneously speaking should be practiced and cultivated. It is the lawyer's avenue to the public. However able and faithful he may be in other respects, people are slow to bring him business if he cannot make a speech." One way to practice this is to grab your local paper and read a few headlines. Practice speaking on those topics for 1-2 minutes for each topic.

18. Join a Toastmasters club. Toastmasters International is an international speaking club designed to help people of all walks of life become more effective communicators and thus more successful. I was a member of Toastmasters for years and I really enjoyed and benefited from the experience.

19. Remember, we don't have to make a long speech in order to be effective. Just say what needs to be said and then stop talking. I remind you of Abraham Lincoln's Gettysburg Address.

20. Use Millard Bennett's 30-10 Power Formula. What is the 30-10 Power Formula? First you read for 30 minutes everyday in whatever area you want to develop yourself in. This will build up your knowledge base. Of that 30 minutes, read out loud for 10 minutes. Reading out loud will improve your communication skills. It will improve your pronunciation, voice inflections, stamina, etc.... Of that 10 minutes, read part of it in a whisper, maybe a minute or two. Reading in a whisper will eliminate all those um, ahh, and all those other verbal fillers. This formula is one of the simplest formulas to practice but one of the most powerful. Try it for a month and see what you think.


21. Understand that an inspiring talk can change the face of an organization, nation, family, or an entire world. I remind you of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.'s "I have a dream" speech, JFK's challenge to put a man on the moon by the end of the decade, and Reagan's "Mr. Gorbachov tear down this wall." I am convinced that if you really practice and work on these 21 steps you will become a POWER COMMUNICATOR and a greater success. Make it happen and have fun.


I would now like to invite you to receive my seminar "The Keys to Empowered Leadership" on MP3 download FREE when you sign up for our Free Take Action Sales Newsletter. You can register at Sales Training. From Mark Bowser of http://www.MarkBowser.com Thanks for reading today.

Optimist or Pessimist?

An optimist sees an opportunity in every calamity; a pessimist sees a calamity in every opportunity. - Winston Churchill

Life is Too Short to Be Little!

Life is too short to be little. Man is never so manly as when he feels deeply, acts boldly, and expresses himself with frankness and with fervor. - Benjamin Disraeli

Faith Is To Believe.....

Faith is to believe what you do not see; the reward of this faith is to see what you believe. - Saint Augustine

Doing is .....

"Doing is a quantum leap from imagining." - Barbara Sher

Finding Time Through Effective To-Do Lists - 3 Myths and 3 Tips

Finding Time Through Effective To-Do Lists - 3 Myths and 3 Tips
By Paula Eder

Finding time is like finding treasure, right? The next question is how to spend it!

If time is money, then to-do lists are the smart budgets that ensure you pay your bills and still have cash left over for that special something. They're powerful and they'll work for you. If you hate them, lose them or never even start them, learn how to use them to your advantage.
It's easy, once you've decided you want to use your time well and will do whatever's necessary. Here are 3 common To-Do Lists Myths and 3 Tips to dispel those myths with Effective To-do Lists.

To-Do List Myth #1: "To-do lists don't work."

Reality: Effective To-do Lists are extremely successful if you construct them well and follow them! Make sure you construct to-do lists as realistic plans that align with your values. Then they're like mini-navigation systems, guiding you through your day and keeping you on track.

To-Do List Myth #2: "To-do lists will just make me feel rotten (or guilty or overwhelmed) at the end of the day."

Reality: Effective To-do Lists will make you feel powerful and accomplished at the end of the day! The secret? Make them short. Only put on what you can realistically do and are motivated to do. If a project can't get done today, don't put it on today's list. Or only enter the small portion you can accomplish. Anything else goes onto your weekly or monthly list, in doable chunks!

To-Do List Myth #3: "To-do lists will just remind me of what I hate in my life or what I'll never be able to get around to doing anyway."

Reality: If making Effective To-do Lists helps you face what you dislike and identify what you want and never find time for, that's a benefit. Examine what you have identified as necessary. If it's truly necessary, then clarify why you value it. Don't waste your time resenting it. If it's not necessary, omit it. If you feel a pang over a valued activity you never get around to, commit to reworking your time choices!

For reinforcement, print this out and post it prominently. Make Effective To-do Lists. Learn to plan and accomplish tasks in manageable increments.

You'll love how Effective To-do Lists help you find time!

What is your next step to make the very most of your time?

You will find expert guidance quickly with our free, twice-weekly Finding Time Tips. You are invited to sign up at http://www.findingtime.net/ezine.html

Each short Finding Time Tip is paired with a practical action step that you can use immediately to enhance your time effectiveness. As a bonus, you'll also receive our free, monthly Award-Winning Finding Time Ezine where we discuss the role of time in our lives.

And for even more time thoughts and techniques, visit our blog at http://www.thetimefinder.com

Offered by Paula Eder, Ph.D. The Time Finder.

Living Up to Others Expectations?

I'm not in this world to live up to your expectations and you're not in this world to live up to mine. - Bruce Lee

Recipes and Grandmothers

If God had intended us to follow recipes,He wouldn't have given us grandmothers. - Linda Henley

Are You Planning to Ding The Universe? If Not-Why?

"I want to put a ding in the universe." - Steve Jobs

Mahatma Gandhi Quote

“Nobody can hurt me without my permission." - Mahatma Gandhi